Monday, November 28, 2011

Thanksgiving Joy

We've survived the Thanksgiving holiday weekend! I bet you probably forgot about it already, didn't you?  We're moving onto Christmas without a second thought about Thanksgiving.  What are you thankful for again? Do you remember?

I am a little 'Bah Humbug' and get a little irritated with the sappy posts about what people are thankful for.  I know I need to be a little more appreciative for the blessings in my life - that's for sure! Just to be clear, I AM thankful for so many things: health, home, car, food, conveniences, children, friends, education, etc.
But grant me a moment of venting about what I'm not thankful about. 
  • My mom  who doesn't bother to call me and wish me a Happy Thanksgiving or to check on her grandchildren.  I find that rude and selfish. And no, I still haven't called her because I'm being stubborn and want to see how long it takes her to reach out.  It could be weeks or months...
  • Stock Images - Stylish smoker
    Looking down her nose at me.
    © Photographer:  | Agency:
    SMIL who asks the same probing, personal family questions: "How is so and so doing?" "Have you talked to so and so?" and she'll go through the list of family members I'm embarrassed about. I don't have any new information on these family members and don't feel like sharing anyway.  When I try to change the subject to talk about my other aspects of my life or what I'm working on, she never really listens or hears me. Either that or she acts like she's scoffing at whatever I find funny or enjoyable.  She just doesn't get me. At. All.  It seems I can't talk to her about any subject without it becoming awkward.  Case in point: me telling my FIL about a cool app called Stitcher, which compiles all podcasts in one place for great listening.  "I don't need any more media to listen to; I've got all the news I need with my NPR." me: "Oh, as a matter of fact, they have NPR podcasts on Stitcher." Crickets.
  • NaNoWriMo. I'm new to it and refuse to lose. I am writing at least 1600 words a day between the hours of 9 to midnight.  Or later. The sleep deprivation is making me depressed and delirious.  I'm not able to keep up with my blog or other chores very well.  Craziness. I can't believe my SMIL kept asking me to show her what I've written - she said she really wanted to read it.  I said no, it's really not a story yet, it's just a regurgitated splattering of words so I could get to the 50,000 word goal.  Plus, it's semi-autobiographical, therefore personal, and I am shy about sharing that with anyone.  It's not that it contains anything super juicy or torrid, it's just that she doesn't understand me, so why would she want to read my story? She would just try to compare it to a piece of classic literature, which it is definitely not, and judge me.  She then went on to tell me of people she knew that were novelists and English professors at some name brand university. (Wasn't really listening.) Me: "Oh, one of my cousins is an author of erotic fiction." Ha - gotcha there! Conversation stopper.
  • Black Friday and Cyber Monday or any holiday shopping.  I only have $50 in my checking account to last me until my unemployment check comes in.  Which it will come later than planned because last week I forgot to send in my claim form in a timely manner (I blame NaNoWriMo).  I don't think my children or husband need any more material things.  My FIL just took my husband out on a big shopping spree and bought him (us) an iPad and a bunch of toys for the children, so it seems we are covered there. I feel as though buying an iPad is a little expensive and possibly not necessary as we both have smart phones and laptops and a PC.  How much technology does one family need?  At one point does it become too much?  "It has great games on it." We have a Wii and a DS that we don't play with; do we need games on an iPad? Just another 'THING' in our lives.
  • Holiday decorations. Another thing to manage. We've inherited a ton from my deceased MIL and it's just too much.  They're not my style and I resent the explosion of Dickens mayhem that has taken over our house.
That is all for now.  That's enough Debbie Downer for one day.  The Big Chicken Hawk does not like it when I'm this disgruntled.  I start attacking everything and I'm no fun to be around.  But one last vent - I am not thankful how he acts like a tough guy in front of his parents and responds to my statements with a condescending facial expression.  I can't weigh in on our activity agenda and schedule? Whatever!

In addition, I am very thankful that November and NaNoWriMo is coming to an end in a few more days.  I am going to win the challenge, so there! Proof that I don't quit everything that gets too hard!

UPDATE: My mom called me this evening. Hooray! She said she spent Thanksgiving alone because she was sick with bronchitis (remember she has COPD) and my sister didn't invite her over until it was too late. ( I feel bad.) She said it was the first time in forever she didn't host a dinner at her house. 

Well, if she wasn't so damn anti-social and angry all the time, she wouldn't have to be so alone.  Is this what my future looks like if I continue to be so disgruntled?

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