It is unbelievable to me that it has been a year since my L'il Chicken Hawk entered into this world. His was the fastest, most scariest birth for me and took me completely by surprise. It has taken me this entire year to recover from the shock of it.
My period actually finally just returned for the first cycle after his birth - how timely. The big blood clots and cramps reminded me of my postpartum experience. It has all been such a blur - time went by fast, but dragged on at the same time.
Not to minimize the fact that he is handsome, healthy, happy and an excellent sleeper and that we have had an awesome year together, but here are some of the not-so-pleasant things that occurred during and after his birth (in no particular order.)
- Immediate immense painful contractions that didn't let up
- Lightening fast delivery with excruciating pain
- Big blood clots
- Neonatal ICU doc had to deliver the baby since he was the only one available
- No epidural since it was too quick
- Extreme hunger and thirst for weeks and months after
- Excessive uncontrollable flatulence
- Bells Palsy struck soon after
- Following Bells Palsy, took series of steroids and antivirals
- Got a breast abscess following the steroids
- Leaking orifices and wastebaskets full of soaked pads: Tucks, nursing and big cotton saddles
- Taking it easy for #2
- Weak abs that strained to get in and out of bed
- Flimsy bladder that leaked upon every strain
- Urinary incontinence and after first sips of coffee, immediate, uncontrollabe need to go #2
- The fear and uncertainty of his initial heart murmur, healing circumcision and his peeing all over at diaper changes
- High blood pressure following delivery
- Psychotic dreams from hormones and sleep deprivation
- Depression and anxiety and insecurities
- Limping around from hip joint pain
- Battle of mammary gland engorgement and round the clock nursing
- Learning the ropes of cloth diapering and laundering them
- Losing the job that I hated and feeling sweet relief to be free of it
- Reaching my goal of nursing for a full year! Yay!
|© Beatrice Killiam | Agency: Dreamstime.com|
Leading up to his first birthday, I was feeling melancholy that this chapter of our lives is over. He is our third and final baby and I'm going to miss the newborn phase. As stressful as it may have been.
We celebrated his birthday by baking him a Funfetti cake, decorating it super cute, making him birthday cards and going to the Santa Ana Zoo. It was such a fun time - train rides, cute monkeys and the playground were the highlight. When we finally gave him his first piece of cake, he was in heaven - squeezing it in his hands, cramming fistfuls into his mouth and reach for more. That boy can eat!
The next stage to tackle is weaning. I'm a little sad to say goodbye to that special time between us, but it'll be nice not to wear nursing bras and pads anymore. To be able to just pour some regular milk in a sippy cup and go about my business.
I'm even considering a job opportunity, so that's a big step in going back to my 'normal' life. Not just any job, though. A family-friendly, flexible, dynamic place to work where I wouldn't be surrounded by buffoons (hopefully). Of course I'm a little torn about it, and I would be fine without a job...for a while.