Tuesday, January 10, 2012

This Chick has an Interview!

Wonderful news ya'll! I have a job interview scheduled this week! I'm getting myself psyched up, I've arranged childcare and logistics.  Now I need to print up my resume on high quality paper, update my portfolio, tidy up my appearance and review my interview questions.

As if just on cue, today Glassdoor emailed me the Top 25 Oddball Interview Questions of 2011.  

Here are some of my personal faves: 
  • “Just entertain me for five minutes, I’m not going to talk.” – view answersAsked at Acosta

    -- Um, yeah, this one time, at band camp...
  • Name 5 uses of a stapler without staple pins.” – view answersAsked at EvaluServe.

    --Ooh staplers! Love them! Reminds me of that gorgeous red Swingline from Office Space. What was the question again?
  • “How would you get an elephant into a refrigerator?” – view answersAsked at Horizon Group Properties.

    -- Very carefully.  First I would get out my chainsaw and cut her into tiny pieces, make a few crockpot meals out of her, then I would take out all the unnecessary items from the fridge, then load her in the biggest Ziplock bags I could find. 
  • “You have a bouquet of flowers. All but two are roses, all but two are daisies, and all but two are tulips. How many flowers do you have?” – view answersAsked at Epic Systems

    --You just stumped me.  Is this for an accounting job because I think I'm in the wrong place?
  • “If you could be a superhero, what power would you possess?” – view answersAsked at Rain and Hail Insurance

    --X-ray vision of course so I could see what color underwear you're wearing!
  • “If you were a Microsoft Office program, which one would you be?” –view answersAsked at Summit Racing Equipment

    --Excel because I'm super fast and can be complicated.
  • “Pepsi or Coke?” – view answersAsked at United Health Group

    -- Neither.  They are terrible for your health.  I prefer Starbucks Salted Caramel Mocha - which is so much better for you. 
Now that I've mastered all of the tough questions, I'm ready to nail this interview!

Actually, I do recall an interview I had about ten years ago where some pompous dude asked me which character from Gilligan's Island would I be.  I was not prepared for his odd question and couldn't think of an appropriate response - there aren't many quality girl characters on that show if I recall.  I asked if I could choose from Sex in the City insteadHe looked dismayed but allowed me to talk about how I would be Carrie Bradshaw because I liked to write, but without the shoe addiction.  Needless to say, I didn't get the job.  But of course I was relieved.  Who wants to work for such a whack-job anyway? Gilligan's Island - pah-lease! (In hindsight, I'd say I would be Marianne, but without the daisy dukes.)

I am very anxious, nervous, sad, conflicted, excited, hopeful and praying that all will go smoothly.  If I don't get the job, it won't be the end of the world, but from the sounds of it, it is pretty much everything I want in a job and company.  They promise flexibility and family friendly, so that's a big plus for me!

1 comment:

  1. I would die if anyone asked me off the wall questions like that on an interview. It's one thing at a dinner party quite another during an interview. I guess they're just trying to have fun with it?